The Things I Must Endure...

So, I have a job.

I could be like many people that were affected by the turn of the economy and be out of a job.

I could be living off un-employment, terrified that at anytime life will throw me a curve ball and I will not be able to keep up with my bills.

But, I do have a job.

So why does it feel like I'd rather be broke than be there?

Could it be because I'm under-utilized? Could it be because I don't have a voice in what is going on?

My boss has a meeting with me today to say, "you are losing credibility because you are late and not doing this and this and this."

Is it wrong that I could really give a fuck? I mean, when I busted my hump, I got no praise then either, so what's the difference? Should I bust my hump and not do what I want to do outside of work so that I can continue to have no voice and get no respect?

Yeah. Doesn't make much sense to me either.

Lord, please see fit to let me get into school, so I can just start over where I want to be. Amen.